Funny Little Men

We all know that kids say the darnedest things.  Having taught preschool and elementary school for several years, I thought I had heard it all.  For instance, a child running out of class into a sea of parents waiting pick their children, yelling, "Daddy!  Daddy! I was a humper with family!".  The child was attempting share the fact that he had been a HELPER, by feeding our classroom fish named STANLEY.  Or the little girl who loved to play house and was always sayings things like, "Complain, complain, complain! Nothing I do is ever good enough for you!"  and "If you hadn't gambled away your entire paycheck, we wouldn't be having this fight, now would we!".

My boys are finally getting old enough to spit out a few doozies of their own.  

We went to Church last Saturday evening.  On the way home we decided to pick up some dinner.  Once we got home, we all sat at the table and ate together.  One of my two year olds randomly announced, "I like Mexicos".  I was so confused.  I didn't even know that he knew the word Mexico.  I thought he might have been talking about the mexican food we were eating.  I said, " You like the yummy mexican Food?".  He quickly replied by saying, "Noooo Mommy!  I like Mexicos!".  Perhaps he's done some international traveling that I am unaware of.

One morning I had the news on while I was cooking their breakfast.  The report was on President Obama's trip to Mexico City.  They showed him waving as he walked down the steps upon exiting Air Force 1.  My children see that the president is outdoors.  In their minds it must have meant that he was in their "outside".  The immediately started shouting, "Boc Obama, outside!", while staring out the sliding glass door.  They were so convinced that he was out there.  For the next few days they told everyone who came over that Barac Obama had been in their back yard.  I guess it's like swearing that you just saw the Easter Bunny.   A few days later I took Aidan to Blockbuster to pick out a few movies for the weekend.  I sat him up on the check out counter, so that he could hand the cashier the money.  As he sat there feeling quite big and important, he shouted, "Boc Obama Mommy!!".  The cashier and I both looked around to try and figure out what he was talking about.  Then Aidan pointed out a poster for the movie Seven Pounds.  He thought Will Smith was Barac Obama.   Oy-Vey.

My other big boy has been confusing the words Freckle and Nipple lately.  He keeps touching people's freckles and saying, "uhh, I touch ah (Insert Name) nipples!".  Although he has been with us for since birth, his adoption in not yet finalized.  He still does supervised visits with his biomom.  The gentleman who supervises these visits is very sweet and caring.  He is a bit of a sassy diva in you know what I mean.  He also has his arms covered in tattoos.  Well in the mind of  my 2 year old, these tattoos are a whole bunch of ouchies and freckles.  As he was carried out to the car to leave for his visit he started shouting, "I touch ah CJ's nipples!  Oh No!! I touch ah CJ's nipples!".   I was so embarrassed.  This poor guy was so confused.  Can you imagine if the wrong ears had heard this interaction!

My husband works in corporate America and is always clean shaven.  Recently, Aidan has become fascinated with facial hair.  So much so, that he now gives himself a "finger mustache".  He points his little finger and holds it across his top lip.  What's funnier, is that his mustache has it's own personality and the voice of Juan Valdez.  He walks around with his deepest, South American voice saying things like, "Hello.  Mustache says hello Mommy!  Good Day!".  

Our house has a little powder room downstairs.  Whenever company or anyone else for that matter uses it, Aidan runs over and lays on the ground trying to say hi to them under the door.  Of course he can't see anything, but he still thinks it's fun to stick his little hand under the door and wave his fingers while saying hello.  His Aunt went in there during one of her recent visits.  He did his typical peeping tom/Walmart greeter routine.  Auntie Dev said, "Auntie's going potty.  I'll be right out".   He walked back into the living room announcing to everyone that, "Auntie Dev is going pee pee with her penis!".